+ Interview with Elan the Mag \\ 03.30.10
Here’s a recent interview with Elan the Mag. I discuss my arch nemesis in life Brad Gordon:
Hasan Minhaj On Comedy and Burritos
By: Sara Elghobashy
March 30, 2010
Comedian Hasan Minhaj began his career at the Punchline Comedy Club in San Francisco . Since then, he’s appeared on E!’s Chelsea Lately and was a finalist for NBC’s Standup for Diversity. Taking his career to the next step, Minhaj has now released his debut album, Hasan Minhaj: Leaning on Expensive Cars and Getting Paid to Do It in February. He recently sat down with elan to talk about the things that matter most to him: basketball, Tyler Perry’s House of Payne and the burrito.
Q: When did you first realize that you wanted to be a comedian?
True story. I was in the 8th grade and I had a brand new pair of Penny Hardaway sneakers. Now this was during the late 90s when Penny was one of the dopest point guards in the league. To keep my new sneaks crisp I put them in my locker while I played basketball in my old worn out sneakers. After shooting hoops outside I went back into the locker room to change into my Penny’s. They felt a little soggy, but I didn’t mind.
As I’m waiting in the parking lot for my dad to pick me up, Brad Gordon (who was one of the coolest kids at my Junior High) asks me about my sneakers. I’m floored. Brad Gordon wants to be my friend and thinks I have dope sneakers.
Me: Oh these? I got them at Foot Locker.
Brad: You sure? I thought you got them from the urinal.
Me: What?
Brad: I put your sneakers in the urinal and peed in them.
A group of guys proceeded to laugh at me as my Dad’s Nissan Stanza pulled up in front of the group and picked me up. Arguably one of the most embarrassing moments of my life. One of the few times I wish I had a comeback up my sleeve. Needless to say Brad Gordon still works at a local grocery store in the town I grew up in. So maybe life writes the best punch lines.
Q: What was your first job?
I used to work at Office Max. By far one of the worst jobs I ever had; because there’s only so much time you can spend around office supplies before you want to kill yourself. People would rarely come into the store, and no matter what I would have to greet them with “Welcome to OfficeMax how can I help you take it to the max?” no matter what. One time a guy walked in just to use the bathroom and I had to ask him how I could “Help him take it to the max” - it was awkward to say the very least.
Q: If you weren’t a comedian, what would you be?
Rapper or pro ball player. To tell you the truth, comedy is just a filler until I can figure out how to monetize either of those two dreams. Although I never played high school or collegiate basketball I submitted myself for the 2009 NBA draft and never made it out of the green room on draft day. It’s okay though, the league wasn’t ready for me.
In terms of my rap career, I’m just waiting to get in touch with the right producers. Dream producer? DJ Khaled. Everyone knows if you get him on a track he’ll do most of the work for you by yelling his name over and over again for three and a half minutes. I’ve made several attempts to reach out to Khaled via Twitter, but he has yet to get back to me. He’s a busy guy, last I checked he was doing radio spots for McDonald’s.
Q: Your debut album is great. How long did it take to come up with the material?
A lot of the material was written while doing standup in San Francisco and LA. Another chunk of the material was written this past year while I was on the road during the NBC College Tour. Doing a string of longer sets in new (and often times interesting) locations definitely helped me come up with a lot of the material on the album. My ultimate goal is to get to a point where I can perfect my jokes in one attempt. Just walk onstage Jay-Z style, and get it perfect in one take. That would be awesome; unless of course Jay-Z decided to start doing comedy. Then it’d be over for me.
Q: What can your fans expect from you in the future?
This summer I will be playing a centaur (a mythological half man/half horse) in Season 3 of the hit Atom.com web series Legend of Neil. I will also be going on a college tour again in the fall.
Q: Who would you play in a movie?
In an ideal world I’d play myself in one of the following two scenarios:
1. I get a call from Joe Pytka (Director of the hit film Space Jam) that Michael Jordan is reprising his role as Michael Jordan in Space Jam 2: Attack of the Toons. In this movie, the Toon Squad turns on humankind and MJ has to defend the human race by challenging the Bugs Bunny and company to a 3-on-3 basketball game. Coincidentally enough he decides to pickup myself and Bill Murray play on his team. I’d be running point, and Bill Murray would anchor down low.
2. Shaquille O’Neal asks me to play his sidekick in Steel 2. If you don’t remember Steel, it was similar to Kazaam in production value and critical acclaim, but twice as awesome. Anytime a 7’1” NBA center dons an entirely adamantium suit; I’m in.
Q: Who did you look up to growing up?
John Starks. He played guard for the New York Knicks during early 90s and was the only dude who would try to go at Michael Jordan. For some reason he looked like bulldog with a flat top, but I really respected his persistence even though Jordan would own him time and time again. Anytime I deliver a joke with uncanny swagger that bombs terribly I always tell myself I pulled a John Starks. So in terms of influences it pretty much boils down to John Starks and my father.
Q: Name two songs that would be on the soundtrack to your life.
I only listen to the hits. “With Arms Wide Open” by Creed and “Tearin’ up my Heart” by ‘NSYNC.
Q: What was the last book you read?
Facebook.
Q: What is the first thing you do Sunday morning?
I do what everyone does on a Sunday morning. I wake up, fire up my DVR, and catch up on Tyler Perry’s House of Payne. They say comedy comes from a real place, and it doesn’t get any realer than on TPHOP. After that I’ll go on YouTube videos. I love watching freestyle battles that end in fights. There’s nothing funnier to me than watching two Korean dudes rap for a minute then just break out in a brawl.
Q: What is your favorite dish of all time?
The burrito. It’s an entire delicious meal wrapped up in a tortilla. So simple; yet, so good. One of the best things about doing comedy is getting to travel the country and find the best burrito spots in each city I visit. Unfortunately the two best states that dominate the burrito game are California and Texas . Alabama? Not so much.
Q: What do you think are the biggest challenges facing Muslim youth today?
I think it’s the same problem youth face across the world. Being themselves. I saw a Lil’ Wayne interview (Because I base all of my life decisions around the sayings of Lil’ Wayne ) where he said the biggest problems with rappers today is that they don’t want to be themselves. They want to be someone else. Now don’t get me wrong, Lil’ Wayne is insane. He’s the only person on Earth that is addicted to Dymatap. But his advice is sound; be yourself, don’t let anyone influence you.
Q: What advice do you have for young comedians who want to break into the business?
Go onstage as much as you can. If you can’t go onstage in the town that you’re in, start a room yourself. Don’t listen to what other people tell you, find your voice and style on your own. If all else fails, record a video of you falling down a flight of stairs and put it up on YouTube. That always works.
+ I’m in the New York Post! \\ 03.29.10
One of my jokes was featured in the New York Post along with some jokes from other great comics. Check it out!
+ I do this for my culture. I’m on the front page of OGHipHop.com! \\ 03.25.10
Meet Hasan Minhaj: ‘I do this for my culture…‘
Meet Hasan Minhaj, an LA-based stand-up comic who’s convinced that Nikki swaggerjacked his last name. The 24-year-old recently released his first comedy album, Leaning on Expensive Cars and Getting Paid to do It. Confused? So were we… until we sat down with him and found out that he’s just like the rest of you OGHH readers: A Jay-Z fan whose ultimate goal is getting an @reply from @THE_REAL_SHAQ.
Why does the cover of your comedy album look like a rap album?
To tell you the truth I’m not really into the whole comedy thing. Standup is just a placeholder; my main goals in life are to be a rapper or ball player. So I wanted my album cover to look like the hip-hop albums that inspired me the most from my childhood and the early to mid 90s.
And those are?
Jay-Z’s Vol 2. Hard Knock Life, Puff Daddy’s No Way Out, and Harlem World by Ma$e.
What do you think about Puff Daddy changing his name to Diddy?
He can do whatever he wants to; he’s Diddy. If he changed his name to ‘Strawberry Shortcake’ it’d still be cool. Everyone would be like “Ohhhhhh waddup Strawberry Shortcake!” Do you follow him on Twitter?
No. I can’t stand his tweets. And its hard to take him seriously when I see CNN posting how I should help save Haiti then all of a sudden I see Diddy post: ‘I JUST DRANK CIROC! LET’S GOOOOOO!!!!’
How did you come up with the name of the album ‘Leaning on Expensive Cars and Getting Paid to Do It’?
My favorite hip-hop videos involve the following three things:
1. Expensive Cars
2. Things blowing up behind the rapper
3. A zero gravity chamber.
If you don’t know what I’m referring to here, please see the ‘Mo Money, Mo Problems’ video. I integrated as many of those things into my album title/cover.
How come you’re not leaning on a car on the cover of the album?
My Lambo is in the shop right now.
OK…Anyway, I don’t understand some of the titles on your album.
The Cancer Curing Baby? Explain.
I have a prodigy baby at my apartment that can cure cancer. He’s like the Lebron James of babies.
Takin’ it to the Max?
My policy in bed.
Captain Planet?
What I liked to be called in bed.
Screw you Zimbabwe?
Of all the countries in the African subcontinent, folks from Zimbabwe have always been the rudest to me. Every other country? Fantastic. Not Zimbabwe.
Madd Comedians?
Remember the Madd Rapper from the Biggie albums? It’s kinda like that.
I also noticed you have skits on your album.
All of the hip-hop albums I listened to growing up had skits on the album to explain a narrative that was happening. It was kind of like a ‘Day in the life of…’ for that respective rapper. My goal here was to show the same thing, except the day in the life of a comedian. As you know, both are similar.
So you’re a big fan of the 90’s.
Yes, I grew up during the 90’s. Actually, the tux I’m wearing pays homage to Jay-Z’s cover of ‘Reasonable Doubt’ (Which came out in ’96) but for whatever reason everyone thinks it’s a James Bond thing. It’s not. James Bond doesn’t lean on expensive cars?
James Bond drives expensive cars. Rappers lean on expensive cars. Those are two very different things. To post up and get paid to lean on cars is a pretty sweet job. Also, being able to wear sunglasses indoors is cool too. I just wanna get to a point where I can sit courtside at basketball games while wearing sunglasses indoors, just so the cameras can cut to me and put me on the Jumbotron while I’m chatting to my rapper friends like Chamillionaire.
So you’d be at a Clipper game.
Yup–Chamillionaire can’t afford Lakers tickets. There are different levels of stunting: Jay-Z sits courtside at Laker games. Beanie Sigel sits courtside at Oklahoma City Thunder games. And yes, this is a shot at Chamilitary records and RocNation.
What do you hope to achieve with this album?
My goal was to have it spread faster than ‘The Carter III’. He had a million digital downloads in one week. So the power is now in your hands, hip-hop bloggers.
Oh, and Ron Artest also personally promised me if we move enough units he’ll shave my name into his head.
Is that one of your goals in comedy?
My goals in comedy are simple. Get Ron Artest to shave my name into his head as the Lakers go into the playoffs, and have Shaq @reply me on Twitter. Hopefully Shaq reads OGHH.
If you could have this album purchased by anyone who would it be?
Shaquille O’neal.
Over Jay-Z?
Absolutely. Ideally he would hear the album and immediately reach out and be like ‘Yo Hasan, I loved the album. Listen, right now I’m working on ‘Kazaam 2’ and I want you to be a part of the project’. Of course I’d tell him yes. Who says no to Shaq Diesel?
Now that you know everything there is to know about Hasan Minhaj, hit up iTunes or Amazon and download “Leaning on Expensive Cars and Getting Paid to do It.” And if you really want to get your hands on that album art, just right-click and save.
+ Punchline Magazine Review of ‘Leaning on Expensive Cars’ \\ 03.17.10
Hasan Minhaj: Leaning On Expensive Cars And Getting Paid To Do It
by Emma Kat Richardson
March 10, 2010
Hasan Minhaj is a thoroughly modern man, and he’s just the type of dude to take great pains to let you know so. He’s also something of an ethnic comedy anomaly; not exactly a niche, genre-oriented comedian, per se, but his combined persona and onstage voice certainly make for an interesting juxtaposition of the best off-kilter and heartily robust comedic vices, springing from origins both from the Indian subcontinent and deep within the bellowing bravado of an American thrust into the spotlight with a microphone.
In his debut comedy album, the overly titled Leaning on Expensive Cars and Getting Paid to Do It (so long Subway could probably charge $5 for it), Minhaj spends much of the album eagerly aping his credibility with the members of Generation: Millennial. It’s a feat accomplished through a plethora of references to, in no particular order or ascending significance: Xbox, YouTube, Facebook (listen below), Kanye West, Zac Efron, Captain Planet, Slumdog Millionaire, Twilight and, well, I’d like to tell you more, but fear spoiling the fun to be had at the expense of social networking and viral media outlets.
Sandwiched in between heavily self-effacing skits are Minhaj’s jokes and frenetic comedic cadences; so madcap is his talent and delivery that it’s almost easy to mistake this first generation American for a curry-infused Dane Cook.
And happily, when Minhaj scores, he tends to win big – he’s in his element most assuredly during rants on present day curiosities, and even more so when waxing poetic (however harshly) on his Indian immigration roots. Leaning on Expensive Cars’ most impressive achievement, by far, is its uncanny positioning as the comedic jewel in a generational snapshot. Few comics have managed to capture the moment perhaps as accurately as Minhaj; found here is true time capsule material for the post-millennial archaeologists yet to begin digging.
+ Album Available Today! \\ 03.08.10
The wait is over! You can get my debut comedy album ‘Hasan Minhaj: Leaning on Expensive Cars and Getting Paid to Do It’ here. For some reason you can also purchase it in Brussels. Shout out to my Belgium fans!